Alright, so today I’m diving into my experience with, let’s call it, a “texan head coach” situation. Basically, managing a team where the leadership style was… intense.
It all started when I joined this project. I was fresh, excited, and ready to contribute. But quickly, I noticed the head coach, our team lead, had a very specific way of doing things. Think loud, demanding, and not a whole lot of room for discussion.
Phase 1: The Initial Shock
- First couple of weeks were spent mostly observing. You know, trying to understand the dynamic.
- Realized pretty quickly that feedback was a one-way street. His way or the highway.
- Saw a lot of people getting shut down in meetings. Ideas dismissed, questions ignored. Morale started dipping, fast.
Phase 2: Finding My Footing (and My Voice)
I knew I couldn’t just sit back and let things keep going the way they were. So, I started trying a few things:
- One-on-ones: Booked regular 1:1s with the head coach. Used them to understand his priorities, but also to gently push back on some of the more, uh, aggressive tactics. Like, “Hey, I see where you’re coming from, but maybe we could try explaining it this way?”
- Building Allies: Talked to other team members, especially the ones who seemed most affected. We brainstormed ways to communicate more effectively with the coach and support each other.
- Document Everything: Started keeping a log of interactions. Just the facts, ma’am. Dates, times, specific comments. This turned out to be super helpful later.
Phase 3: The Pushback
Things came to a head during a particularly brutal code review. The coach was just tearing someone apart, and I couldn’t take it anymore.
- Spoke up in the meeting. Politely, but firmly. “I think [team member’s name] has a valid point about [technical issue]. Maybe we can explore that further?”
- It was tense. You could have cut the air with a knife. But, to my surprise, the coach actually paused. He didn’t agree completely, but he did listen.
- After the meeting, I had another 1:1 with him. This time, I was more direct. “I’m concerned about the impact your communication style is having on the team. We’re losing good people, and it’s affecting our productivity.”
Phase 4: (Some) Progress
To be clear, the coach didn’t magically transform into a touchy-feely guru. But, he did start to make some small changes:
- Started asking for input from the team before making decisions.
- Gave more positive feedback, even if it was just a quick “good job” here and there.
- Was slightly less dismissive in meetings. Baby steps, people.
It wasn’t a perfect situation by any means. But, by speaking up, building alliances, and documenting everything, we were able to create a more tolerable, and even somewhat productive, work environment.
Lessons Learned
- Don’t be afraid to speak up. Even if it’s scary.
- Find your allies. You’re not alone.
- Document, document, document. It’s your shield.
- Manage expectations. Change takes time, and it’s not always going to be dramatic.
- Know when to walk away. If the situation is truly toxic and you’ve exhausted all other options, sometimes the best thing you can do is leave.
Hope this helps someone else dealing with a similar situation. It’s tough, but you can get through it.
